Drive through

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The concept of the 'Drive thru' is still fairly new over here in the UK. Just the other day I saw the first drive through cash point (ATM). It was complete with comprehensive instructions...

Men.

1. Drive up to the Machine and wind down window.
2. Insert your card and at the prompt, enter your PIN No.
3. Request the amount of cash you require.
4 Retrieve card, extract cash and receipt.
5. Wind up window, drive off.

Women.

1. Drive up to the machine.
2. Reverse back one metre, to align car with ATM.
3. Stall the engine.
4. Wind down window.
5. Wind down YOUR window.
6. Check make-up in the rear view mirror.
7. Rummage around in handbag to locate ATM card
8. Empty handbag onto passenger seat in a further attempt to find ATM card.
9. Marvel over finding the missing lippy.
10. marvel again over finding ATM card.
11. Attempt to insert card into ATM.
12. Open car door to allow easier access to the, still too distant, ATM.
13. Insert card.
14. Muse over the endless possibilities of the PIN No.
15. Rummage around the handbag contents (still on passenger seat) to find fag packet with PIN No. written on the back.
16. Enter the PIN no.
17. Re-Enter the CORRECT PIN No.
18. Enter the amount of cash to withdraw.
19. Re-enter a sensible amount.
20. Check make-up in the rear view mirror.
21. Retrieve purse and place cash within.
22. Check make-up in the rear view mirror.
23. Look for cheque book to place receipt within, give up and shove it in the ashtray.
24. Check make-up in the rear view mirror.
25. Drive forward (2 Metres).
26. Reverse 2 Metres to retrieve ATM card.
27. Check make-up in the rear view mirror.
28. Apologise to motorist behind for almost reversing into them.
29. Re-start engine and pull off.
30. Drive for three miles.
31. Release handbrake.

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